The bride looked stunning in her flowing white dress
And the congregation was all dressed up in their best
How the groom grinned and how the bride smiled
As she dragged her wedding dress train up the isle.
But how the groom cowered and how the bride fumed
When the groom's first love stood and spoke to the room.
"Sit Down!" cried the bride but his first love stayed standing
If you're going to marry him there's one thing I'm demanding
I insist that he shags me to satisfy my yearns
I'm still so in love so we'll have to take turns
I am his first love, as jealous as can be.
Is there room on the groom for a first love like me?
"No!" Cried the bride and threw her down to the ground,
Where she lay there unconscious not making a sound.
She'd landed upon the wedding dress train,
But undeterred the bride set off again.
But how the groom cowered and how the bride fumed
When the groom's Mistress stood and spoke to the room.
"Sit Down!" cried the bride but his Mistress remained
I bet you think you've got him fully trained
But each time you argue it's to mine he does come,
We cuddle and fuck and have lots of fun.
I am his Mistress as horny as can be,
Is there room on the groom for a Mistress like me?
"No!" Cried the bride and smacked her straight in the face
And the body did fall amidst the disgrace
She'd landed upon the wedding dress train,
But undeterred the bride set off again.
But how the groom cowered and how the bride fumed
When the groom's latest Ex stood and spoke to the room.
"Sit Down!" cried the bride but his Ex shouted out
He said it was forever, and that was his vow.
Now I'm alone and life's purpose has gone,
I won't let him go, I refuse to move on.
I am his Ex as jilted as can be,
Is there room on the groom for a Ex like me?
"No!" Cried the bride and started seeing red,
She picked up a bible and whacked thrice round her head.
Her body landed upon the wedding dress train,
But undeterred the bride set off again.
But how the groom cowered and how the bride fumed
When the groom's favourite Hooker stood and spoke to the room.
"Sit Down!" cried the bride but his Hooker did say
He still owes me for last night, and earlier today.
And then there's last weekend with all of the boys,
And he said he'd pay extra for the use of the toys.
I am his Hooker as dirty as can be,
Is there room on the groom for a Hooker like me?
"No!" Cried the bride and with one simple cut,
Slit quickly her throat and murdered the slut.
Her body landed upon the wedding dress train,
But undeterred the bride set off again.
But how the groom cowered and how the bride fumed
When the bride turned and directly spoke the groom.
Her outraged Bridezilla went on the attack,
Have you been shagging these whores all behind my back?
"Yes!" Confessed the groom turning red with the shame,
It's not what it looks like. Let me explain.
With you I make love, with them it's just sex.
There not even attractive (except for my ex).
Today is our wedding and I'm very sorreeee.
Is there room in the bride for a groom like me?
"No!" Cried the bride and with all senses warped,
Cut out his heart and held aloft of the corpse.
Then with all the bodies that still lay on the train,
She decided that she would start over again.
I was his bride and escaped narrowly,
There is room to improve my partner to be.
She took hair from the First Love cut fresh from her head
The Mistress's arse and his Latest Ex legs.
The tits of the hooker and the mistress's face,
And muttered a spell that put them all in their place
Then much to the congregation's affront
She stripped off them all and chose her favourite cunt.
Grim as it sounds, this haphazard design
Worked out for the best, the result was divine.
Then a kiss brought the cadaver to life,
And the bride thought she would make a very nice wife.
I was his Bride but no more men for me.
Would you marry a bridezilla woman like me?
"Yes!" She cried out and with much joy and laughter,
The married there and then and lived happily ever after.